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Starting New Job

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    • August 23, 2014 at 3:02 am #16483
      Danielle
      Member

      So, I just started working for the first time in my life and they are currently training me for cash. I’ve only started working two days ago and I’ve gotten two hours of training total so far, and I can be left alone to work somewhat. Anyway, I have so much anxiety about screwing up or displeasing people. I know it’s expected to have to take time to learn and such, and I know/hope I’ll get used to it quickly, but it’s just so difficult to focus on doing the job right when being so nervous and worked up. Sometimes it feels like too much at work, and I feel like crying and at home I do cry, tonight I’ve been crying for like an hour. I feel like crying anytime I think or talk about cash and I’m dreading going into work tomorrow. Every time I’m there, I just feel so stupid, and inadequate and it’s making me feel depressed at home. I don’t know how to combat these feelings or how to get rid of the anxiousness so that I can focus on my job.

    • August 24, 2014 at 1:23 am #19227
      Youthspace
      Moderator

      Hey Danielle,

      I am sorry to hear you’re having such a tough time right now. It sounds like you really want to do a good job and the thought of making a mistake and having people judge or be disappointed in you is paralyzing for you.

      I get the sense that even though you know it takes time to learn something new and that mistakes are a big part of learning, your feelings of anxiety are taking over and making it difficult sometimes for you to believe that’s true. I imagine it’d be pretty frustrating to have your nervousness making it so much harder for you do the job. It seems as if you’re panicking about doing a good job and panicking about panicking and that sounds very stressful!

      You mentioned wanting to combat your anxious feelings, and I wondered what have you done in the past to help yourself feel calm and cope in challenging situations?

      I’ll be sending you thoughts of strength and courage while you try and find your footing at this new job.

      We’re here for you <3

      Youthspace

    • August 28, 2014 at 4:02 am #19228
      Danielle
      Member

      I almost cried again today at work. I was feeling slightly better until today where I was in a hurry and absentmindedly put on my sandals to go to work, which was in violation of the dress code. I got to work and one of the other employees saw and told my manager about my sandles and my manager lectured me about dress code. Now, that shouldn’t have really bothered me like it did but I’m a rather sensitive, people-pleasing person and I get really upset when I feel people are disappointed in me or I’ve made a mistake, no matter how little. I also feel a little betrayed and disrespected because of the employee that told on me, I mean, I know I shouldn’t have been wearing sandals but I wished they would have at least came and talked to me about it first before going straight to my manager. Anyway, I had to get my Dad to bring my sneakers, and while I was waiting for him, I felt like I could cry. On another note, I’m just frustrated I suppose, I feel like their not training me well, and most people there seem a little arrogant and condescending. Having said that, I do really love some other aspects of my job, some of the older ladies I work with are sweet and reassuring, I love helping customers and organizing the shelves.
      Even just talking and expressing my experiences help me a lot in dealing with some of my anxiety, there’s a lot of after-the-fact things I do to help but I can’t seem to get a hold of my anxiety and emotions while in the moment. I try to take deep breaths but that just seems to worsen my urge to cry or freak out.

    • August 31, 2014 at 1:51 am #19229
      Youthspace
      Moderator

      Oh Danielle, I can imagine it felt like such a huge setback for you the day you accidentally wore sandals to work. Sounds like you were starting to feel a little more calm and settled, and that the combination of being betrayed by your coworkers and lectured by your boss brought you right back to that anxious, uncertain place. I get the sense that when you forgot that one minor detail, it triggered that old, all-encompassing fear that you might not be good enough for this job, and that even though in your mind you know it wasn’t a huge deal to violate the dress code, your emotions are stabbing through your confidence with daggers of self-doubt.

      It sounds like you really like the job you are doing, but when it comes to the team and how it’s organized you feel a little let down. I imagine it doesn’t help your anxiety to sense you’re not being well-trained, and that it might feel as though every task you’re not totally sure on is a test or a trap to set you up to fail. It seems to me that you feel very vulnerable to your anxiety in those moments when panic takes over and you can’t stop the tears, and I would guess it makes the anxiousness worse to have to fear being overwhelmed by emotion on top of all the other worries.

      I’m glad to hear that talking things through can be helpful, that’s precisely what we are here for…to listen and support you. You are welcome to use this forum whenever you need to express your thoughts, and we are also available to you in live chat from 6pm-11pm PST. I’m grateful that you found us, and I hope you’ll keep checking in when you need to <3

      Youthspace

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