Nie,
It sounds like this unbearable pain is weighting too strongly on you and your dog. I am imagining that the thoughts of suicide and strong need for this pain to end bring you and your dog closer. Maybe you two are there for each other in a way that no one else is understanding right now…

How have you been able to keep yourself safe from these desires to die?

I see incredible strength from deep inside you Nie, something that still holds onto the spark of life. Can you tell me more about how you and your dog can support each other through this dark time?

Sending support to both of you,
The Support Team