It is hard im sick of being sick and getting better is so hopeless it seems.

Were starting winter break so it should be less stressful but im still so busy and have a lot to do.

I have had thoughts of suicide but I’ll agree to that safety plan still.

I had a youth leader talk to me about why acting on gay feelings is wrong and how i cant give up on my fight to be straight/ pure and how its the only way ill ever get happiness is if i follow those teachings. its really upsetting me and i cant help but hate myself because i have acted on them and what if that does mean i’ll never be happy.

I just don’t know,
~Joy