Welcome to youthspace. I can hear that things are really scary for you, and I can only imagine how exhausted and on edge you must have been when you posted yesterday morning. I am so glad you posted on our forum.
From you saying that your “uncle constantly answer me sexually,” I am understanding that he abused you sexually… am I right? No one ever deserves to be abused and hurt like that, and I can only imagine how devastating and scary it must have been to have gone through that when you were so young, and by someone you were supposed to be able to trust. Thank you for trusting us to tell us about the abuse. Can I ask how long ago it happened… how many years has it been since you were 12 (if that was the last time?).
It must be so terrifying to be forced to now share a room with the man that abused you, and I can hear how anxious it makes you to be asleep beside him – I imagine that your brain wouldn’t want to fall asleep at all, in order to try and protect yourself. Are there other ways besides not sleeping that you have tried to make yourself feel more safe when he’s around?
That is such a huge secret to carry, and I am guessing that it would be eating you up from the inside… especially if you were forced to pretend everything was okay on the outside. Have you been able to talk to anyone about what your uncle did to you? If you wanted to give us your location (even just generally state/province?), I could look into some resources that you could reach out to in order to talk about what’s going on for you?
I want to again thank you for posting here at youthspace ozryn, it takes a ton of courage to reach out.