I get the sense from your other forum posts that you’re losing hope on the things and people that normally help you to alleviate the awful emotions and thoughts that have taken over in your life. It seems to me you’re lost in a sea of hollow coping strategies which, like the workbooks, aren’t helping all that much. In fact, it sounds like having those workbooks forced on you has really pissed you off and that you’re embarrassed your mom would think something like that would help.
I’m getting the sense that your plan is to run away from home, am I right in hearing that? Or maybe I’ve missed the mark? It worries me to hear you describe it as a way to become dead to yourself…it makes me think that although your life might not be at risk, your being is, does that make sense? It sounds like you’re hoping to put an end to the things that make you who you are, and I imagine you’re extremely fed up with the way things are to want to do that.
I can hear how bleak things have become for you, and how desperate you are for a release from what’s troubling you. I feel uneasy knowing how alone you feel, and misunderstood by those you are closest to. We’ll be here for you as long as you need us, both on this forum and on the live chat from 6pm-11pm (and ’til midnight on Fridays and Saturdays) if you’d like to have a more back-and-forth conversation with us.
The Support Team