Hi Nie,

I can really hear how connected you feel to your dog and how much empathy you have for the pain he was feeling from eating such spicy food. It sounds like you were really able to identify with his desire to escape that pain — I’m guessing that’s how you sometimes feel when life gets really tough for you.

I want to remind you Nie that if things get really bad for you then you can reach out for help by dialing 911 or a crisis line. We are also here every night 6-11pm PST (and until midnight Fridays and Saturdays) if you want some more immediate support for us.

We are here to listen to you Nie and to support you in the darkness you’re fighting through for as long as you need us.

The Support Team

Nie,
It sounds like this unbearable pain is weighting too strongly on you and your dog. I am imagining that the thoughts of suicide and strong need for this pain to end bring you and your dog closer. Maybe you two are there for each other in a way that no one else is understanding right now…

How have you been able to keep yourself safe from these desires to die?

I see incredible strength from deep inside you Nie, something that still holds onto the spark of life. Can you tell me more about how you and your dog can support each other through this dark time?

Sending support to both of you,
The Support Team

Wow Nie,

It’s quite something how connected you and your dog are — and that you are there for him, and he is there for you. It’s huge to have someone in your life you can rely on as support (even if they have 4 legs ). It’s good to hear that he’s feeling better.

I can hear though, that your pain is enduring, Nie. It sounds like it’s hard to tell what the future will bring, and that you feel very precarious, and that you don’t know how much you might want to end your life from moment to moment. That seems like a bleak and scary place to be. Is there anyone you could reach out to if you did start to feel very suicidal? We’re always here for you, but I know that responses can take a few days on the forum, and I’m wondering what you might be able to do if those feelings come on really strong all of a sudden?

Stay strong.
The Support Team

Oh Nie. I can hear you are really struggling with these thoughts of suicide and the constant uncertainty in your life. I get the sense that you feel vulnerable to a negative spiral down into suicidal feelings at any time.

I get the sense that you don’t feel confident that you can reach out if you need to, but at the same time I see a real strength in your continued sharing here. I see courage in you. Courage that keeps you fighting, for you and your dog.

What helps you make it through this uncertainty Nie?

Here for you,
The Support Team

Hi Nie,

We’ve responded to this and your other forum posts under your thread “Bulemia/EDNOS” in Physical Health, in order to streamline our conversation with you.

Glad you’re checking in, as always.

The Support Team