It sounds like you spend a lot of your energy caring about those around you without feeling like you’re receiving any of that energy or concern back from those people. I can imagine it must feel very vulnerable to open your heart to the world and for it to seem as though no one notices or cares.
I’m so sad to hear that your sister misunderstood your intentions when you shared your pain with her — your pain in this world is certainly valid, regardless of the circumstances of others who are also suffering. It’s like you’re standing in a crowded room yelling and no one seems to hear that you need some help.
I’m really sorry to hear you didn’t get a response when you reached out using another aspect of our service. If you were chatting in with us it may have been a high-volume night and I’d encourage you to try again. If you were using the e-counselling service they normally respond within 5 business days… if it’s been longer than that then please email [email protected] with the details of when you contacted the online counselor so we can ensure the service is working properly.
I’m glad you’ve decided to reach out to the counselors at your school. It’s really scary to see that you’ve been thinking so much about suicide these days without anyone knowing how serious things are for you. I hope you will continue to check in with us here and through our chat service (open 6-11 PST every night) so we can offer you support
The Support Team