i don’t really take care of myself i just have to suck it up and keep going . i went to emergency 4 times and they just sent me home telling me nothing was wrong when clearly something is wrong and it scares me to think that they wont help me till its too late. Like i have to die before they even consider that i might actually have a problem.

Im almost caught up but its the last week before break so i have the old and the new stuff pilling up and i only have 3 days to do it all and im stressed to the max!

i just wish i wasn’t so lonely i use to have so many people and friends and now i have no one i feel so alone and hurt because if i was gone no one would care.

Im just really tired i try so so so so so hard and nothing good happens i feel like i never get a break from pain i always am dealing with some form of pain.

i don’t know im running out of reasons to bother trying im never going to amount to anything i should just face the fact im a failure. I just im tired and i wish that someone around me would care for once im always taking care of everyone else and i just never seem to get it in return.

~Joy