TigerMama,

This is an amazing piece of work. It shows your emotional struggles with such depth and reality…which is challenging! Emotions are slippery and don’t necessarily like to fit into tidy words very easily. Sometimes even when we’re awake, emotions can make reality feel like a dream (or nightmare), and I think you captured that idea here.

We did edit out just one line that we thought might be a possible trigger for people who self-harm. It didn’t feel great editing anything out of this post as it’s clearly a creative work of art as much as it is an expression of your personal story. If you have any questions about why we did an edit, please feel free to touch base with us through our email, [email protected]. Your story does represent some very true aspects of struggling with the thought of death as a relief, and with the devastation of feeling utterly alone with emotions that are so enormous. Thank you for posting it here for others to read. <3

You're so right that people don't have to feel those things alone, and it IS beautiful when we have someone who can anchor us. We hope that youthspace can be a place of anchoring, and of course we invite you to use the live chat as well when you want to unburden some of the heavy emotions.

-The Youthspace Team