It’s not funny, please it’s not a joke, don’t you understand laughing at someone and than making comments about it, isn’t a joke? What if it is true, what if what you said to me last night is true?
I walked to work, and with little notice I threw up, all over my sweater and continued to walk to work, threw up again. I came in the back door my manager is like, “you know your not suppose to use the back door…”
“I know I have vomit all over my sleeve and I puked twice on the way here.”
My co-worker asked if I was pregnant. I said no.
A few minutes pass and I’m like, “god I am so dizzy”
“oh my gosh you are pregnant this happened to me.”
I walk away and come back and she asked how old I am, I tell her.
“Oh my gosh, your so young how are you going to raise a child being so young.” her jaw dropped to the floor.
I walk away and come back. Manager and co-worker are laughing and talking about me. “what are you guys laughing about.”
“we’re just trying to guess if your having a boy or girl…” I laugh and walk away saying, “year right”
It’s not fucking funny! What if I am? It’s not funny.
The person, my friend, he… if I am, he is the one… I… don’t want to think about it, it never crossed my mind until they made a big deal and joked about it. It’s not funny.
I have unexplained acne all over my face that I can not get rid of! I’ve been focusing on that, until they joked about me throwing up and I said, “it just happened, with no warning…” and they assume I am pregnant? I was more worried about having the flu… I went home ill, I could have stayed but the comment and joke just made me not want to stay.
I am fine now. I am fine. I felt sick a bit this morning but never got sick.
I can’t bare a child, not like this, not like this. I can’t. I’m so alone, very alone. I want to disappear and not remember their comments, I’m not concerned if I am pregnant.
It’s not funny.
It’s not a joke.