Hey Martin Henrique,
I get a sense you are feeling abandoned by everyone closest to you, with your dad becoming ill, your gf breaking up with you so heartlessly, your friends talking about their gfs constantly, and your mom saying such hurtful things to you. Even NHL hockey hasn’t been there for you lately, which I would guess is normally a big part of your day-to-day life. I imagine you are feeling angry that so many people around you seem to want you to be someone you are not, and particularly pissed off that your ex seems to be drawn toward someone for the wrong reasons.
I can hear how deep and unrelenting your pain is right now, and that you have been searching for different support resources that might help alleviate some of that pain. It sounds like chatting with us hasn’t always been as helpful as you’ve expected; I’m wondering what you have hoped to see happen in the chats that isn’t happening right now? I’d also like to let you know that if you choose to use the chat in the future (and we hope you do!) you are welcome to refer to this post so that you don’t have to repeat your story and can focus more time on what’s going on for you in the moment.
It sounds like suicide is often, if not always, on your mind lately. It sounds like you have come really close to ending your life…is the anticipation of NHL games coming up still helping you hold on? Is there anything else you’ve been able to do to help you cope? Have you self harmed again since the first time the other night?
We hope you will keep connecting however you can, Martin Henrique. Our thoughts are with you in this overwhelmingly difficult time.
the Support Team